If love has a providence

1

My roommate, Stacy, had this takeout-thieving habit. One day, she went too far - she scarfed the food my online gaming buddy, "ShadowStrike," had ordered for me.

Later, ShadowStrike sends me a screen-grab from the delivery guy's camera and hits me with, "You look like that? How dare you even talk to me? Gross!"

He dumps me and immediately hooks up with "Valkyrie," the top female gamer in our scene.

Everyone starts posting pics of Valkyrie, laughing at me, "Look at the whale who got dumped.