Chapter 1

Chapter 1

My son's preschool was holding a family field day.

I rushed there as fast as I could, only to see him holding hands with my husband's secretary.

"Mommy Mara, I wish we could be a family like this forever," he said.

Seeing the three of them hugging, looking like a picture-perfect family, I felt a sudden, crushing exhaustion.

I decided right then to apply for a divorce.

I also signed up for a fifteen-year teaching mission in the most remote, rural part of the country.

If I couldn't light up the lamps in my own home, I might as well light the way for others.

......

When I was filling out the volunteer forms, the principal tried to stop me.

"Aria, this commitment is for fifteen years at least. You've always been so devoted to your husband and son. Don't do this."

"You know what this mission means to those kids in the mountains. It's not a game," he added.

Looking at his worried face, I nodded firmly.

"Sir, please trust me. Teaching has always been my dream. As for my husband and son... someone else will take better care of them."

I gave him a deep bow, refusing to budge.

He sighed and patted my shoulder.

"I get it, but it's not just hard work. It's dangerous. Poverty can bring out the worst in people. I hope you're ready."

I had done my research before making this choice.

I knew that isolation could breed old-fashioned, harsh mentalities. But I wasn't afraid of hardship or danger.

"Kids in the backwoods need a way out. That's the only way that land will ever see a change. You're a teacher too, sir. You know that if we're always afraid, they'll never escape. I can't let that happen."

I chose this path because I came from the mountains myself. I needed to go back to where I started.

That's what my mentor always told me.

"Fine. You're an incredible teacher, Aria. I'm proud of you. Go home and pack. You leave in twenty-four hours."

He didn't try to stop me again. He knew my mentor and had watched me grow. He understood my heart.

On the way home, I looked up at the sun. It felt warm, just like the path I was about to take.

"Auntie Mara, catch me!"

As I walked through the front door, my son giggled and bumped into my legs. I reached down to steady him.

I wanted to give him a hug, but Toby turned around and pouted at Mara.

"Auntie Mara, why didn't you tell me she opened the door? I'm mad now. I'm not playing with you anymore."

"Toby..."

My voice felt raspy. My chest ached with a dull, bitter pain.

"Stop yelling! If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have tripped. You're a mean mommy. Get out of the way!"

Toby shoved me with his tiny hands. He didn't have much strength, but the gesture hurt more than any blow.

I felt like I couldn't even stand.

"Oh, Aria, you're back. Caleb is cleaning the upstairs. Just make yourself at home."

Mara didn't look guilty at all. She picked Toby up with one hand and poured me a glass of lukewarm water with the other.

"Have some water. I'll keep Toby busy. Don't feel like a stranger."

The way she spoke made her sound like the lady of the house. It made me feel like an intruder.

It felt like I hadn't come home, but had walked onto my own execution grounds.

"Auntie Mara, why are you talking to her? Daddy said she's an outsider. We're the real family."

My knuckles turned white as I gripped the glass. I forced a small, pleading smile. "Toby, want Mommy to play with you for a bit?"

They say mothers and sons share a heartbeat. I loved him more than anything.

From the second he was born, I wanted to give him the whole world. But now, we were like strangers. It actually scared me.

"Go away! Who wants to play with you? I have schoolwork to do."