Chapter 2

2

When I woke up again, I was in a hospital bed.

I watched the family in the next unit, laughing and sharing a meal. I felt a sharp pang of envy.

"Why is she allowed to eat a burger?" I asked quietly.

The doctor paused, looking confused. "I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"Those are junk food," I whispered. "My mom says they're poison for the body."

"It's okay to have them once in a while," the doctor said gently. "You shouldn't worry so much."

"No, Mom would be furious," I said, a self-deprecating smile touching my lips.

I hadn't had a full meal in eighteen years, all for the sake of her version of a perfect body.

Suddenly, my mother burst into the room. Without a word of greeting, she started screaming at the doctor.

"What kind of hack are you? Do you have no ethics? Encouraging a child to eat garbage?"

"Show me your medical license! I'm reporting this hospital. Staying here is toxic for my daughter!"

Shame burned through me as her voice echoed down the hallway.

"Mrs. Sterling, please," the doctor tried to intervene. "Nadia is severely malnourished. She needs a balanced diet."

"She fainted because of severe anemia and exhaustion. Her body simply can't handle this level of physical stress."

"Balanced diet? That's just a scam to get more money out of us!" my mother shrieked.

"My daughter's diet is scientifically formulated. You want a perfect body? You have to suffer for it!"

"Look at her! Do you see how perfect she is? Look!"

Before I could react, she began tugging at my hospital gown, trying to expose my frame to the room.

I was too stunned to fight back. I couldn't believe she was doing this in front of everyone.

"Look at her lines! Could someone who eats junk food ever look like this?"

The mother of the little girl in the next bed couldn't stay silent any longer.

"Mrs. Sterling, that's your daughter! How can you humiliate her like this?"

The woman tried to pull my mother away while the doctor rushed to cover me back up.

I felt a sense of total powerlessness. It felt like my heart was being encased in ice.

How could she shame me like this in public?

"Mom, please stop," I whispered, catching the edge of her sleeve.

She violently slapped my hand away.

"You little brat! Don't think I don't know you're craving that trash. Are you really that desperate for food?"

Her rage escalated. She swung her hand and landed a sharp blow across my face. My cheek swelled instantly.

As tears welled up, I saw her tapping furiously on her tablet.

My body jerked. Suddenly, the pain, the shame, and the sadness evaporated. I felt... nothing.

I turned to the worried woman in the next bed and gave her a perfectly scripted smile.

"It's okay, ma'am. My mother only wants what's best for me. Please don't worry."

"I'm sorry, Mom. I was being difficult," I said, my voice smooth and robotic.

My mother looked at my bruised face, and for a second, a flicker of guilt crossed her eyes. Her voice softened instantly.

"As long as you understand, honey. Once the IV is done, I'll take you to school."

That afternoon, as I walked toward the stairs at school, a group of students blocked my path.

"It was you! You're the one who fed Cooper that chocolate. He's dying!"

One of them shoved a phone in my face, showing a picture of a golden retriever trembling and foaming at the mouth.

My voice shook as I looked at the dog's suffering.

"I only gave him lactose-free milk. I didn't hurt him."

Someone shoved me hard against the wall. The impact sent a jolt of pain through my spine.

A boy grabbed me by the collar, lifting me up and slamming a fist into my chest.

I let out a muffled groan as tears escaped.

"You're always so cold, acting like you're better than everyone. We're all hurting, and you're just standing there smiling!"

I felt a wave of helplessness. I didn't want to be a person without emotions.

But because of my mother's control, a smile was the only thing I could produce.

I tried to shrink away, but they dragged me back out. My face was pressed hard against the rough brick wall.

"Stop hiding! Everyone knows you're a dog killer!"

It wasn't until evening that my teacher, Ms. Quinn, took me home and explained the situation to my mother.

The moment the door closed, my mother exploded.

"Why are you always causing trouble? Did you feed that dog something stupid? Why else would they blame you?"

"You're going to school tomorrow, you're going to get on your knees, and you're going to apologize. I won't have you embarrassing me!"

I looked up in shock. "I didn't do it, Mom. Why should I apologize?"

"Does the truth even matter? Why aren't they bullying anyone else? It's your fault for being a target!"

"And look at your face! I spend a fortune on your skin, and you let yourself get scarred? I forbid you from being damaged!"

"Now, get on your knees. You aren't eating dinner until you realize what you've done wrong."

Suddenly, my knees buckled. A signal from the chip forced me into a kneeling position.

I gripped my jeans, my knuckles turning white.

Mom, I never wanted perfect skin. I just wanted to be your daughter.