Chapter 3

3.

Julian confessed his feelings on my eighteenth birthday.

As fireworks exploded over the Potomac River, he held my hand, his gaze intense and passionate. "Amelia Reed, be my girlfriend."

The moment I nodded, I felt like I had the whole world.

I told Chloe the news first. She stared at me for a long time before managing a weak smile. "Congratulations, Mia."

From that day on, everything changed.

Chloe started to get "sick" all the time.

At first, she'd call both of us during my dates with Julian. Her voice would be fragile, on the verge of tears. "Mia, Julian, my migraine is back. Can you come keep me company?"

I would panic. Halfway through a movie, I’d grab Julian's hand and rush out. "Let's go, Chloe must be so scared all alone!"

Back then, I was more anxious than anyone. Chloe was my best friend, and Julian was the man I loved. I wanted the person I loved to take care of my best friend.

Julian would look at my worried face, smile helplessly, and ruffle my hair. "Okay, whatever you say."

But slowly, the calls started going only to Julian.

"Julian, I'm dizzy. Can you come pick me up? Mia has a midterm tomorrow, let's not make her run around."

"Julian, I think I have a fever... Don't tell Mia, I don't want her to worry."

Her excuses were always so thoughtful, so considerate. So considerate I could never argue against them.

Julian hesitated a few times.

Once, we had tickets to see a play at the Kennedy Center. Just as we were about to leave, Chloe called again.

He frowned, speaking into the phone, "Chloe, take some Tylenol. We'll come over after the show."

A muffled sob came from the other end, followed by short, panicked breaths. "Julian... am I... am I bothering you...?"

Julian's expression changed instantly. He hung up and looked at me, his voice full of apology. "Mia, Chloe's fever is back. I have to go check on her. You're worried about her too, right?"

He used my own concern to shut down any argument I might have made.

What could I say?

I was living in the Baxters' house. Robert and Carol had been incredibly generous to me. I couldn't be selfish; I had to be understanding. I couldn't let them think I was petty enough to resent their sick daughter.

Besides, I truly did consider her my friend.

So I could only force a smile and nod. "Go ahead. I'm fine."

Once, twice, a thousand times.

I went from genuine concern to disappointment, and finally, to numbness.