Chapter 1

1.

After the car crash, Lily Parker lost her memory.

She remembered everyone―except for Spencer Ashford.

Her best friend, Sophie Ashford, who had been by her side for days, froze when she realized Lily genuinely didn't recognize the name.

"Lily, it's just us. Be honest with me―is this another one of your tricks to get my brother's attention?"

Lily looked completely lost. "What? No, I really don't remember. Who is he?"

"You're not messing with me? Then swear on it―hand on your heart, tell me you really don't remember."

Without a moment's hesitation, Lily placed her hand over her chest.

Seeing her swear without even blinking, Sophie looked like she’d been struck by lightning. She grabbed Lily’s shoulders and shook them.

"You really have amnesia? And you only forgot my brother?!"

Lily couldn't understand her friend's dramatic reaction. "So, who is Spencer?" she pressed.

Sophie's expression was complicated. She rubbed her temples and began to explain, piece by piece.

"Spencer is my brother. Do you remember coming over for dinner during freshman year break? You saw him and fell head over heels. You've been chasing him for seven years since that day…"

Hearing this, Lily’s mind was a complete blank.

"So, is he my boyfriend now?"

Sophie forced an awkward smile.

"Not exactly. He's always been incredibly cold to you. He's still in love with someone else―his college sweetheart, Isabel. When they broke up, he drank himself into a stupor every day and nearly ended up in the ICU. He's never gotten over her."

"This time, it was because Isabel was coming back from Paris. He was in such a rush to pick her up from the airport that he abandoned you on the highway during a storm. That's why you got into the accident."

The words hit Lily like a ton of bricks. She stood there, mouth agape, utterly speechless.

"Wait a minute―so you're telling me your brother is a total dick to me, is in love with someone else, and indirectly caused my accident because of her? What could I possibly see in him? Are you sure you're not making this up?"

"Why would I lie to you? Everyone knows you're hopelessly in love with my brother."

Sophie shook her head and handed Lily her phone.

Lily took it, skeptical, and tried to unlock it with a familiar string of numbers. It didn't work.

"That's not your password anymore. It's my brother's birthday. July fifteenth."

Lily typed in 0715, and the phone unlocked.

She opened the photo gallery, and her screen was flooded with thousands of pictures of a man she didn't know.

She stared at his breathtakingly handsome face for a long time, slowly realizing that what Sophie said must be true.

Spencer was exactly her type.

But in every single photo, all of which seemed to be taken from a distance, his eyes were as cold as ice whenever he glanced toward the camera.

A heavy feeling settled in Lily's chest as she opened the notes app.

It was filled with everything about Spencer―the kind of coffee he drank, the social events he hated.

And then there were the diary entries.

"A seventh Valentine's Day. I spent half a month rehearsing my confession, and just as I expected, he rejected me again. Spencer, you said we could never be together, but I just can't let you go."

"You were drunk again tonight. You mistook me for her, calling her name all night. You said you could never forget her―that even though you knew she'd never come back, you'd chase her like a moth to a flame. In that moment, I realized we were the same―both of us helpless and pathetic in love…"

Even without her memories, the raw pain and despair in those words struck her to the core.

A lump formed in her throat, and tears welled up in her eyes before she could stop them.

She stood there, stunned, for a long, long time.

The hospital room was quiet for what felt like an eternity before Sophie finally spoke.

"So… what are you going to do now? Do you want to try and get treatment? My uncle is a neurology specialist at Mount Sinai, but he’s overseas for a conference right now. If you want…"

"Forget it. I don't remember him, but I can feel that the old me, the one who loved your brother, must have been miserable. Now that I've forgotten, maybe this is my chance to be free."

Lily took a deep breath, looked down at her phone, and deleted every single photo and every single note.

Sophie's eyes widened, but before she could say anything, her phone rang.

She hung up, grabbed her bag, and rushed out the door.

"Something urgent came up at home. Lily, you get some rest. I'll be back to see you as soon as I'm done."

The door clicked shut.

Just as Lily was about to get some sleep, a call came from her parents.

"Lily, we've talked about this before―have you seriously thought about moving back to Portland? You've been in New York by yourself for so many years, and your father and I are worried about you. Your father mentioned that his college roommate's son, Ryan, opened his own architecture firm in Portland. He's a great guy. Would you be willing to at least meet him?"

Mrs. Parker was fully prepared for rejection; this call was just a last-ditch effort.

But after a few seconds of silence, Lily agreed.

"Okay. As soon as I wrap things up in New York, I'll come back to Portland."

Mrs. Parker couldn't believe her ears.

"What―what did you say? Are you giving up on your best friend's brother? The only reason you were so determined to stay in New York was because of him. What changed your mind?"

Lily didn't know how to explain the amnesia, and she didn't want to worry her parents with the news of her accident.

She settled on a vague answer.

"I don't like him anymore. And I never will again."