Chapter 3 The Want and the Wall

Priya stared at me with wide eyes.

"Who is Marcus?" she asked again.

I sat down on the couch. My legs felt weak. "He was Damian's head of security. He helped me escape three years ago. He left a door unlocked. He deleted the security footage. Without him, I would never have gotten out."

"And now he is working for someone else?"

I nodded. I read the text again. Someone else was looking for me. Someone who wanted to hurt us both.

Priya sat beside me. She was quiet for a moment. Then she spoke in a low voice.

"Mara, this is exactly what he does. He creates a threat so you run to him for protection. It is a classic manipulation tactic. Make the world scary. Make himself the only safe place."

"I know."

"Do you? Because you are still reading that text like it means something."

I put the phone down. "What if it is true? What if someone else is looking for me?"

"Then we handle it. The network handles it. We do not need Damian Cross to protect you."

I wanted to believe her. I really did. But I kept thinking about Damian's eyes in the bookstore. The way they looked at me. Not like a predator. Not like a victor. Like a man who had lost everything and was trying to find one thing he could not live without.

"I need to meet him," I said.

Priya stood up. "No."

"Just once. One conversation. He said after that he would let me go."

"He is lying."

"Maybe. But if there is someone else out there looking for me, I need to know who. I need to know why. And Damian is the only one who can tell me."

Priya paced the room. She did that when she was angry. Back and forth. Back and forth. Like a caged animal.

"You are making a mistake," she said.

"Maybe. But it is my mistake to make."

She stopped. She looked at me. Her face was hard. But her eyes were sad.

"You know what he did to you. You remember the rules. You remember the punishments. You remember the night you called me from a payphone with blood on your hands."

I flinched. I did not want to remember that night. But it was always there. Right beneath the surface.

"I remember," I said.

"And you still want to see him?"

I did not answer. That was my answer.

Priya grabbed her bag. She walked to the door. Then she turned one last time.

"If you go to him, I cannot help you anymore. I cannot watch you walk back into that. I cannot save you from yourself."

"I am not asking you to save me."

"Then what are you asking?"

I stood up. I met her eyes. "I am asking you to trust me."

She laughed. It was not a happy laugh. "Trust you? I trusted you three years ago when I gave you a new identity. I trusted you when I taught you how to disappear. And now you want to throw it all away for the man who almost killed you."

"He did not almost kill me."

"Then what do you call it?"

I did not have an answer. Because she was right. There was a night I did not talk about. A night I had buried so deep I almost believed it never happened.

Priya opened the door. She stepped into the hallway. She looked back at me one last time.

"I hope you find what you are looking for. But I think you are looking in the wrong place."

She closed the door behind her.

I was alone.

I sat on the couch for a long time. I stared at the roses. I stared at my phone. I stared at the wall. I thought about everything and nothing.

What did I want?

I wanted to be free. I wanted to stop being afraid. I wanted to know if Damian was telling the truth. I wanted to understand why I still felt something for him after everything he did.

What was stopping me?

I was afraid. Afraid of him. Afraid of myself. Afraid that if I saw him again, I would remember all the reasons I loved him. And I would forget all the reasons I left.

At two in the afternoon, I picked up my phone.

I typed a message.

"Where do you want to meet?"

The reply came in seconds.

"The cafe on Fifth Street. Tomorrow at noon. I will be alone. I promise."

I stared at the message. Then I typed one more thing.

"If you lie to me, I will disappear again. And this time you will never find me."

"I know," he wrote back. "And that is why I am telling you the truth."

I put the phone down. I walked to the window. I looked out at the street. Normal people doing normal things. They had no idea what kind of monsters walked among them.

And I had no idea which one I was becoming.