Chapter 2

1

The moment I stepped out of the rehabilitation facility, the world felt like a distant, alien place.

The director’s warning still echoed in my ears, his gaze sharp and venomous like a snake’s tongue. He offered a chilling, crooked smile that made my skin crawl. “Hayes, you’d better keep your mouth shut out there.”

Recalling his inhumane methods, I shivered uncontrollably, my entire body trembling.

In the distance, I saw a high-end black sedan pulling up to the curb.

As it drew closer, I could see a distinguished man sitting in the backseat.

Alistair glanced over, saw me, and said, “Get in.”

The sound of his voice sent a sharp, stabbing pain through my skull.

When I first arrived at that place, I was locked in a pitch-black room and subjected to aversion therapy.

The director would blast Alistair’s photos and voice recordings while shocking me, screaming insults the entire time: “Homosexuality is a sickness! You’re obsessed with your own stepbrother―you’re nothing but trash!”

Now, the mere sight of Alistair made those phantom shocks pierce my brain like a thousand steel needles.

Seeing me frozen in place, Alistair’s expression darkened. “What are you waiting for?”

“No, please! Don’t hit me!”

I could almost see the director’s electrified baton looming over me again.

Ignoring the shooting pain in my dislocated ankle, I stumbled toward him, shaking violently.

Back at the facility, even the slightest sign of defiance meant brutal punishment.

Beatings, electric shocks to the brain, needles pressed into pores―it was all just part of the daily routine.

The phantom agony hit me like a tidal wave.

I curled into a ball, shielding my head like a terrified stray dog, and scrambled into the car.

Once inside, I sat as far away from Alistair as humanly possible.

My head was pounding with an unbearable intensity.

Alistair looked stunned. I used to be the one always clinging to him.

I would follow him around calling his name, and when his company wasn’t too busy, he’d pick me up from school.

He used to tutor me in math with endless patience, just like a gentle older brother.

That sweetness was what caused me to fall for him.

But everything changed the moment he discovered the feelings I had kept buried so deep.

His eyes had turned icy, and he told me, “Hayes, this is a mental illness. It needs to be cured.”

My nightmare had begun.

“Is there poison on me? Why are you sitting so far away?”

Noticing me huddled in the corner of the back seat, wringing my hands, Alistair finally spoke.

My heart hammered against my ribs. His voice triggered the same reaction in my brain as those electric shocks.

“Homosexuality is filth. Homosexuality is a sickness. I shouldn't be like this. I’ve failed my parents, I’ve failed society.” I recited the mantra the director had forced us to repeat a hundred times a day, trying to suppress the panic threatening to shatter my heart.

Seeing my vacant expression, as if I hadn’t even heard him, Alistair’s brow furrowed. “Why aren’t you saying anything?”

I shuddered, panic surging through me like a high-voltage current. My voice was barely a whisper. “No, that’s not it. It’s just... I’m dirty. I’m not clean. I shouldn’t be bothering you.”

“Everything was my fault before!”

These were the things the director had drilled into me while whipping me, screaming, “You dirty freak! You piece of trash! If you ever dare to have a deviant thought about Alistair again, I’ll peel the skin right off your bones!”

Another brutal slap had followed, and blood had poured from my nose and mouth, staining the floor.

That day, because I had ‘soiled’ the floor, the director had forced me to lick it clean.

The training ground, the size of a basketball court, I had to lick it clean three times over.

Alistair frowned even deeper, clearly confused by my behavior.

But then, he let out a scoff. “I thought you had turned over a new leaf. Turns out you’ve just gotten smarter at playing the victim.”

I opened my mouth to explain, but the words died in my throat.

He wouldn’t believe me anyway. If I angered him and he sent me back to that place...

The thought made me shiver. I knew that if I returned, it would be a fate far worse than death.

I stayed silent. Alistair, taking my silence as an admission of guilt, huffed, “I’m warning you, don’t try any games.”

He took a deep breath before adding, “I brought you back because of Mom’s health. She wants to... she wants to see you one last time.”

“Auntie... how could she be sick?” Mentioning her condition made my nose sting with tears.

Visions of her coughing weakly, yet forcing a smile whenever she saw me, flooded my mind.

“So watch your mouth. Don’t let your filthy thoughts taint her ears.” Alistair gritted his teeth, his disgust for me evident.

“I promise! I won’t do anything to upset her!” I vowed through clenched teeth.